Because what if the best thing we can teach them⊠is that they donât have to be perfect to be worthy?
Lately, Iâve been reading Daring Greatly by BrenĂ© Brown, and it cracked something wide open in me.
She talks about the âculture of scarcity.â How we wake up thinking, âI didnât get enough sleep,â go to bed thinking, âI didnât get enough done,â and spend the hours in between believing weâre not good enough, not smart enough, not thin enough, not extraordinary enough.
Sound familiar?
It sure does to me. In fact, she could be speaking about me.
And while I read those pages, all I could think about was our kidsâespecially our teensâand how theyâre growing up with this pressure turned all the way up. The filters. The likes. The GPAs. The scholarships. The achievements. The âwhatâs next?â questions they get asked way too early.
Itâs a lot. And for some, itâs too much.
What if one of the reasons so many of our young people are turning to substances, including dangerous ones like fentanyl, is because itâs the only way they know how to quiet the voice that says: Youâll never be enough?
And what if we could change that?
The Real Danger of âNever Enoughâ
Hereâs what I believe with all my heart:
Scarcity thinking is exhausting.
And for our kidsâwho are still learning who they areâitâs dangerous. So dangerous.
We see it when they obsess over test scores, when they compare their looks and lives to what they see online, or when they feel like a failure for not knowing what they want to be at 18 when half of us change our minds in our 30s! The world keeps whispering theyâre not doing enough⊠or worse, that they are not enough.
And when those feelings pile up? Sometimes, drugs feel like an escape. A pause button. A way to stop caring.
Fentanyl, especially, is sneaky. Itâs laced into pills and black-market vape pens and marketed like candy. One moment of curiosity, one try to feel âOK,â and it can become a tragedy.
That is why this matters. Because when kids feel rooted in who they are, when they feel safe, connected, and accepted without needing to prove anythingâthey’re less likely to seek that escape.
So What Can We Do?
We canât shield them from everything. But we can give them tools that remind them:
đ You are already enough.
Here are 7 practical ways to start:
1. Celebrate the Ordinary
Help your child know they donât have to be extraordinary to matter. Celebrate effort. Celebrate kindness. Celebrate them just being them.
Ask at dinner:
âWhat was one small win today?â
2. Model Self-Compassion
Let them see you mess up. Let them hear you say things like:
âThat was hard, but Iâm still proud of myself.â
Our kids learn how to treat themselves by watching how we treat ourselves. And self-compassion is not my strong point. I am working to change that.
3. Talk About Social Media Truthfully
Have honest conversations about filters, comparison traps, and curated content. Not from a place of shame, but from awareness.
Say:
âEven I get caught comparing myself online sometimes. Youâre not alone.â
4. Encourage Vulnerability
Create a âjudgment-freeâ zone where they can talk about fears, failures, or hard days without fixing it or reacting.
Try:
âYou donât have to have it all figured out. Iâm just glad you shared it with me.â
5. Reconnect with Nature & Movement
Get outside. Ride bikes. Walk the trails. Plant a garden. Breathe in fresh air. Nature has a way of reminding us weâre whole, even in the messy moments.
6. Make Kindness a Family Value
Talk about compassion, not just achievement. Leave kind notes. Pay for a strangerâs coffee. Model empathy. And point out when you, as a parent, slip up.
Build the habit of asking:
âHow can we make someoneâs day better today?â
7. Affirm, Affirm, Affirm
Make âI love you as you areâ a daily anthem.
Use mirror notes, texts, or random hugs. Help them internalize that love isnât earnedâitâs given, and they deserve it.
A Final Word for the Grown-Ups
If youâre reading this and wondering if itâs too lateâplease know this:
Itâs never too late to start whispering you are enough.
Start with yourself. You donât have to be a perfect parent. You donât have to have all the answers.
You just have to be present, honest, and willing to love them through the tough parts.
Even in grief. Even in fear. Even in the unknown.
Letâs Keep the Conversation Going
đ± Whatâs one âordinaryâ thing youâll celebrate today?
đ» What helps you (or your child) remember you are enough?
Tell me in the comments or share this with someone who needs the reminder.
đ PS: Want to Go Deeper?
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đLight and Love ~Mandy


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