Three days ago it was beautiful outside.
Sunshine pouring through the windows.
Warm air that made me crack the windows open and breathe a little deeper.
The kind of day that makes you think, Maybe things are turning around.
And today it is dreary and below freezing. We dropped 40 degrees in a day.
But if you’ve lived in Ohio long enough, you know how this goes.
Because two days from now?
It could be sunny and almost spring-like.
Or sunny and bitterly cold.
Or gray and heavy and bone-chilling.
And somehow… grief feels exactly the same.
When the Warm Days Start to Appear
There comes a point in grief — especially after deep loss — when the days don’t feel quite as unbearable as they once did.
You laugh unexpectedly.
You feel sunlight on your face and notice it.
You breathe without forcing yourself to.
And you think, Maybe this is it. Maybe I’m finally coming out of the worst of it.
Those days feel like Ohio’s random warm spell in February — shocking, welcome, and full of cautious hope.
You don’t trust it yet.
But you enjoy it anyway.
And Then the Cold Comes Back
Just like the weather turns on a dime, grief does too.
One moment you’re okay.
The next, you’re slammed with sadness you didn’t see coming.
A memory.
A date.
A photo.
A song.
And suddenly it feels like winter again.
Cold.
Sharp.
Heavy.
And the worst part isn’t always the sadness itself — it’s the letdown after you thought things were improving.
You start wondering:
- Did I imagine the progress?
- Was I fooling myself?
- Why does it hurt this much again?
But here’s the truth Ohio weather has taught me — and grief confirms:
Those warm days were real.
And so is the cold.
Progress Doesn’t Mean “No More Winter”
Coming out of the deepest parts of grief doesn’t mean the pain disappears.
It means the seasons start to change — unpredictably.
It means:
- The freezes don’t last as long
- The warm days return more often
- The sun feels brighter when it shows up
But winter doesn’t vanish overnight.
And expecting it to only sets us up for disappointment.
Learning to Enjoy the Warmth Without Fear
One of the hardest lessons grief teaches is this:
You’re allowed to enjoy the good days — even if bad ones still exist.
You don’t have to brace yourself constantly.
You don’t have to feel guilty when things feel lighter.
You don’t have to assume every warm day is a lie.
Ohio weather doesn’t apologize for being unpredictable.
Grief doesn’t either.
But both remind us to:
- Soak up the warmth when it’s here
- Open the windows when we can
- Let the light in — even briefly
The Letdown Doesn’t Mean You’re Failing
If you feel crushed when the cold comes back — emotionally or literally — it doesn’t mean you’ve gone backward.
It means you’re human.
It means you felt hope again.
And hope always makes the contrast sharper.
But here’s the quiet truth:
You survived the cold before.
And now you know the warm days do return.
Even if they don’t stay as long as we want them to. Even if they feel different than they used to.
Trusting the Seasons
Grief is not a straight line.
Healing isn’t permanent sunshine.
It’s seasons.
It’s cycles.
It’s unexpected warmth and sudden cold snaps.
And slowly — almost imperceptibly — the balance shifts.
More warmth than cold.
More light than darkness.
More moments of peace than panic.
Not because the loss disappears…
But because you learn how to live in all kinds of weather.
Holding Onto This Truth
If today is warm for you — emotionally or literally — enjoy it.
If today feels cold again — be gentle with yourself.
Neither one defines your future.
Just like Ohio weather, grief doesn’t mean the seasons are broken.
It means change is happening — even when it’s uncomfortable.
And one day, you’ll realize:
Spring comes more often now.
Even if winter still stops by sometimes.
Love and Light ~Mandy
Affirmation:
Just like the seasons here, my heart is allowed to change.
Warm days do not erase winter—but they prove it won’t last forever.
I will take today as it comes and trust tomorrow to do the same.
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