Stormeyes Enchanted

July is Bereaved Parents Awareness Month.

That sounds simple enough when you say it like that.

A month on the calendar.

An awareness month.

A reminder.

But for parents who have lost a child, it is not just a topic. It is not just a ribbon, a hashtag, or a neat little square on social media.

It is our life.

It is the name we still say.

The birthday we still remember.

The pictures we still look at.

The memories that still make us laugh and cry, sometimes in the same breath.

The empty space at the table.

The missing voice.

The “this would have been their kind of joke” moments.

The ache that may soften over time, but never fully leaves, because love does not clock out just because death entered the story.

Bereaved Parents Awareness Month is recognized every July as a time to raise awareness about the grief parents carry after the death of a child and the support they need. It is a month for remembering, honoring, educating, and reminding grieving parents that they are not alone.

And honestly, that matters.

Because child loss can feel very lonely.

Even when people love you.

Even when people care.

Even when they mean well.

There is something about losing a child that can make the world feel like it does not know where to place you anymore.

People get nervous.

They avoid the name.

They worry they will upset you.

They say too much.

They say nothing.

They disappear.

They try to fix what cannot be fixed.

And sometimes we, as bereaved parents, end up carrying not only the grief of our child being gone, but the extra weight of helping everyone else feel less uncomfortable about it.

Which is a lot.

We already have grief. We do not need to also become full-time emotional tour guides for the awkward.

Although let’s be honest, some of us could probably run that tour with snacks and a sarcastic side commentary. 🤫

What This Month Means

Bereaved Parents Awareness Month is not about staying sad for an entire month.

We do not need a designated month for that. Grief already has its own schedule, and it absolutely refuses to use Google Calendar.

This month is about awareness.

It is about acknowledging that parents do not stop being parents when their child dies.

It is about recognizing that child loss is not something a person “gets over.”

It is about making room for the truth that grief changes over time, but love remains.

It is about honoring children of every age and every circumstance.

Babies.

Toddlers.

Teenagers.

Adult children.

Children lost through miscarriage, stillbirth, illness, accident, overdose, suicide, violence, medical complications, and circumstances the world may or may not understand.

There is no age where losing a child becomes easy.

There is no cause of death that makes a parent’s love less sacred.

There is no timeline where the missing suddenly becomes convenient.

A child is a child.

A parent is a parent.

And love is love.

What Bereaved Parents May Do This Month

Every bereaved parent will handle this month differently.

Some may post every day.

Some may share pictures.

Some may tell stories.

Some may light candles.

Some may visit a cemetery, a garden, a favorite place, or somewhere that feels connected to their child.

Some may donate, advocate, volunteer, write, create, plant flowers, make memorial art, or support other grieving parents.

Some may say their child’s name more often.

Some may keep everything quiet and private.

Some may not even realize it is Bereaved Parents Awareness Month until someone else mentions it.

All of that is okay.

There is no correct way to observe a month that represents the worst thing a parent could ever live through.

For some, awareness means speaking out.

For others, it means surviving quietly.

For some, it means educating people.

For others, it means protecting their heart and taking a nap.

Honestly, sometimes the nap is holy.

Say Their Name

One of the simplest and most meaningful things people can do for a bereaved parent is say their child’s name.

I know that makes people nervous.

They worry they will remind us.

But here is the thing:

We remember.

We are not walking around peacefully unaware that our child died, until someone says their name and ruins our day.

Their name is already in our heart.

Their absence is already in the room.

Saying their name does not create the pain.

It acknowledges the love.

It tells us they are not forgotten.

It tells us someone else remembers they lived.

That can mean more than people realize.

A simple text like, “I was thinking about Garet today,” can touch my heart in a way that is hard to explain.

Not because it fixes anything.

It does not.

But because it says, “He still matters.”

And every grieving parent wants to know their child still matters.

What Bereaved Parents Wish People Understood

We may still laugh.

We may still have good days.

We may still decorate our homes, go to work, take classes, parent other children, make jokes, go out to dinner, worship, travel, and live life.

That does not mean we are “over it.”

It means we are learning to live with it.

We may cry at unexpected times.

A song.

A smell.

A date.

A picture.

A milestone.

A child who looks the age our child was.

A child who looks the age ours should be.

A random grocery aisle betrayal because grief likes to hide between cereal and paper towels like a menace.

We may talk about our child often.

That is not being stuck.

That is continuing a bond.

We may not talk about our child much.

That does not mean we loved them less.

That may be how we survive.

We may be both grateful and heartbroken.

Hopeful and exhausted.

Peaceful and still hurting.

Proud of the children still here and aching for the one who is not.

Grief is not one emotion.

It is a whole weather system.

And bereaved parents learn to live under skies that can change quickly.

How to Support a Bereaved Parent This Month

If you love a bereaved parent, you do not have to do something huge.

You do not have to have perfect words.

You do not need a counseling degree, a five-step grief plan, or the emotional confidence of someone who has never once said the wrong thing in public.

Most of us are not asking for perfection.

We are asking for tenderness.

Here are some simple ways to show support:

Say their child’s name.

Send a message that says, “I am thinking of you and remembering them with you.”

Share a favorite memory if you have one.

Look at pictures if they want to share them.

Remember birthdays, angel dates, holidays, and important milestones.

Ask, “Would you like to talk about them today?”

Offer specific help, not just “let me know if you need anything.”

Say, “I can bring dinner Tuesday,” or “I can take the kids for an hour,” or “I can sit with you if this week is hard.”

Do not compare losses.

Do not rush them.

Do not tell them everything happens for a reason.

Do not avoid them because you feel awkward.

Do not assume silence means they are fine.

And please, do not think tears mean you did something wrong.

Sometimes tears are simply love leaking out because someone finally gave it room.

Little Things That May Bring a Smile

Sometimes people want to support a grieving parent but do not know how to do it in a way that feels gentle.

Small things can matter.

A candle with their child’s name.

A handwritten card.

A photo you found and shared.

A donation in their child’s memory.

Flowers in their favorite color.

A rock for a memorial garden.

A wind chime.

A text on a hard date.

A cup of coffee dropped off with no expectation of conversation.

A message that says, “No need to respond. I just wanted you to know I remember.”

A small ornament or keepsake.

A story about something funny their child did.

A simple “I miss them too.”

These things will not erase the pain.

But they may bring a moment of warmth.

And sometimes a moment of warmth matters more than people know.

For Bereaved Parents

If you are a bereaved parent, I hope this month feels less like pressure and more like permission.

Permission to say their name.

Permission to share their picture.

Permission to tell the same story again.

Permission to laugh at a memory.

Permission to cry because the missing is too loud.

Permission to be quiet.

Permission to ignore the entire month if that is what your heart needs.

Permission to honor your child in a way that feels right to you.

You do not owe anyone a performance of grief.

You do not have to be inspiring.

You do not have to be strong every minute.

You do not have to turn your pain into purpose before you are ready.

You do not have to explain why it still hurts.

Of course it still hurts.

Your child matters.

Your love matters.

Your grief matters.

And you are still their parent.

Always.

For Those Who Love Us

If someone in your life has lost a child, this month is a gentle opportunity.

Not to make a big dramatic production.

Not to force a conversation.

Not to make them responsible for teaching you what to do.

Just to remember.

To reach out.

To say the name.

To acknowledge the love.

To let them know their child has not disappeared from everyone else’s memory.

You might feel awkward.

That is okay.

Awkward with love is better than silence with distance.

You can say something simple:

“I know July is Bereaved Parents Awareness Month, and I just wanted you to know I am thinking of you and remembering your child.”

That one sentence could mean everything.

Honoring the Love That Still Remains

Bereaved Parents Awareness Month is not about making grief heavier.

Most bereaved parents already carry plenty.

It is about honoring the love that still remains.

It is about helping the world understand that our children are not gone from our hearts just because they are gone from our arms.

It is about creating a little more compassion.

A little more courage.

A little more willingness to say the names.

A little more awareness that support matters long after the funeral.

Because the truth is, bereaved parents live with a love that has nowhere simple to go.

So we remember.

We speak.

We create.

We cry.

We laugh.

We honor.

We keep loving.

And maybe this month can be a reminder to the people around us that they can help carry that remembrance too.

Not by fixing what cannot be fixed.

But by making sure our children are not forgotten.

Closing Reflection

This month, maybe the most beautiful thing we can do is remember with love.

If you are a bereaved parent, may you feel seen.

May you feel allowed to honor your child in whatever way your heart needs.

May you be surrounded by people who are not afraid of your tears, your stories, your silence, or your child’s name.

And if you love a bereaved parent, maybe this is your gentle nudge.

Send the message.

Say the name.

Share the memory.

Light the candle.

Offer the meal.

Remember the date.

Show up softly.

Because support does not have to be loud to matter.

Sometimes love looks like a simple text that says:

“I remember.”

And sometimes those two words can bring light into a place that has felt very lonely.

If you are a bereaved parent, what is one way you wish people would honor or remember your child this month? You are welcome to share in the comments if you feel comfortable.

Sources & Fact Check

Bereaved Parents Awareness Month is widely recognized each July as a time to raise awareness about the grief parents experience after the death of a child and the support they need. Hand to Hold describes July as a month dedicated to raising awareness of the support needed after child loss, and Centerstone also identifies July as National Bereaved Parents Awareness Month.

National Bereaved Parents Day is a separate observance created by A Child of Mine in 2020 to honor bereaved parents from all walks of life and to recognize parents who have lost a baby, child, or adult child.

Support suggestions such as saying the child’s name, remembering important dates, sharing memories, and offering specific practical help are commonly recommended by grief-support organizations, including Hospice Savannah.

Gentle Journal Prompts

If you are a bereaved parent, you may want to take a quiet moment this month to reflect on one of these:

What is one memory of my child that still brings warmth, even if it also brings tears?

What is one way I would like my child to be remembered this month?

What do I wish the people who love me understood about my grief right now?

What small act of remembrance would feel comforting to me this week?

You do not have to write anything perfect. A sentence counts. A name counts. A memory counts. Even tears on the page count.

Love and Prayers

~Mandy

References

A Child of Mine. (n.d.). National Bereaved Parents Day. https://achildofmine.org.uk/national-bereaved-parents-awareness-day/

Centerstone. (n.d.). Support for bereaved parents, families, and friends. https://www.centerstone.org/our-resources/health-wellness/support-for-bereaved-parents-families-and-friends/

Hand to Hold. (2021, July 1). Bereaved Parents Awareness Month. https://handtohold.org/bereaved-parents-awareness-month/

Hospice Savannah. (2024, July 4). July is Bereaved Parents Month: Here’s how you can help a grieving parent. https://www.hospicesavannah.org/july-is-bereaved-parents-month-heres-how-you-can-help-a-grieving-parent/